I was at a friends house the other night nursing her 3 week old little boy Oliver, I cooked her dinner (while hubby was out at a work function) and then told her to go to bed and get some rest while i took care of him for as long as he would allow. Before giving birth I remember her conversations about how she really did not want any family coming to stay with her for the first couple of months and how she just wanted to get used to things on her own... well I can say that all changed 4 days after he came into the world. She ended up having to have an emergency c-section and lifting him was hard, feeding was hard, even going outside to the local shop was hard. She then opened up to help, to people giving her and her husband assistance so they could rest when needed and to just generally lending a hand. Its funny how we tend to shut ourselves down sometimes to being able to do everything, especially as a new Mum I think we feel as though we are failing if we ask for help in those first few weeks. I am here to say ASK!!!!! People love to feel needed and you know how good it feels to give to people and we all know people love a new little baby :-) So if you are a new Mum, need sleep and just wish someone would cook dinner tonight why not ring a friend (who probably has not offered because she does not want to intrude) and just say "could you come round tonight and cook dinner and just help me with some things, I am exhausted". You will be suprised how quickly they will be there.

What are some of your stories on when you have realised you needed some help and when friends or family have been able to take the pressure off allowing you time to enjoy motherhood and your new baby? Look forward to hearing from all of you!

I think it\'s really that you do not realise how hard it is until you have been there. However, I think it\'s better when people just offer you food than hang around. I had a lot of people coming in and out of my house at the beginning and I found it very stressful, even though I was glad I didn\'t have to cook. So, if people had come with food and left, I think I would have found it a lot easier.

I agree Chinalilly. Until you are doing it, you have no idea how difficult it will be. But with me it was the hospital! My son was born prem, which in itself was a stressful time anyway, but the visitors constantly coming and going was so hard. I was exhausted after a very difficult labour and just wanted to sleep and enjoy my baby and be left alone, to be honest! I am currently 38 weeks pregnant and am very happy that I have carried this baby to term. I am finding this pregnancy a lot more difficult especially with running around after my 2 year old and at first I hated asking for help, but I have learnt to ask. I ring my parents in the morning and ask them to take my son so I can have a sleep and they gladly do it for me. My mother-in-law also comes over with dinner when she is in town - she\'s from the country.